Motley Crue Shouldn’t Be Alive – My Top 10 Incidents Proving Their Imortality

A stoned Nikki Sixx fires a huge rocket from his backyard. It sets a 40 foot palm tree on fire that then falls onto his 1965 Mustang convertible, sending it up in flames. Nikki thinks this is hilarious.

A couple of days into a BBQ at Vince Neil’s house, Mick Marrs, full of Jack Daniels and a mix of brandy and Kahlua, takes a handful of Quaaludes and walks out of the house and into the surf in an attempt to commit suicide. Members of the band spot him washed up on the beach and try to drag him back into the house, but Mick just wants to be left alone.

Before a show in Rochester, NY, Vince Neil is pissed off because there is no French's Mustard at the craft service table. He slams a bottle of Gulden's Dijon against the wall severing tendons, nerves, an artery and almost cutting a finger off his right hand. The show is cancelled and he is airlifted to a hospital in Baltimore.

West Tech Security sends a guard to Nikki Sixx's home, only to find him naked and waving a shotgun, accusing the guard of bugging his house. He sees Mexicans and midgets running around his house, and neighbors report seeing the drug crazed rocker crawling naked around his yard with the shotgun days earlier.

Five days later, Nikki is lying in bed with his lover Vanity when he hears voices and people moving around in his bathroom. He starts shouting and fires a .357 several times through the bathroom door. Vanity barricades herself into another room until Nikki finally realizes what he heard was just the radio. He then proceeds to unload the rest of the gun's rounds into his JBL speakers.

Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson's home safe is broken into and several items including a video of their 5 day, sex filled houseboat trip on Lake Mead are stolen. Nobody is hurt, but the rest, as you know, is internet porn history.

Tommy Lee is giving friend Joey Vera, bassist for Armored Saint, a ride home from a gig on the back of his motorcycle. He flips the bike 7 times on a Hollywood freeway, sending himself and Joey to the hospital. Tommy escapes with minor injuries, but Joey's hand is mangled preventing him from playing the bass for months.

Vince Neil throws a BBQ at his house in Rodondo Beach to celebrate their latest album. The party lasts for several days, and eventually a gin soaked Vince needs to make a booze run. Jumping in his red Pantera, Neil and Hanoi Rocks drummer Nick "Razzle" Dingly head for the local liquor store. The car slides sideways on a slick spot on the road and Neil looses control. Doing 65 mph in a 25 mph zone, the car collides with oncoming traffic injuring himself, two others and killing Razzle.

Nikki Sixx and Tommy Lee are at a friend’s house snorting coke off a glass top grand piano. They proceed to hop into a hot tub with several naked women. Nikki scales the wall of Roy Thomas Baker's house in his birthday suit and jumps into his Porsche, intent on seeing Lita Ford at her house. Reaching speeds in excess of 90 mph, he wraps the German sports car around a telephone pole. A couple driving by pulls Sixx into their car and takes him to the hospital, where he is treated for a separated shoulder.

After a night of partying with his pals from Guns n’ Roses, Nikki Sixx, Slash and Steven Adler return to their hotel suite to meet with a heroin dealer. The dealer ties Nikki off in the bathroom and shoots him up with his latest batch of Persian heroin. Nikki eminently turns blue and collapses on the floor. While the dealer leaps from the window fleeing the scene, Steven and his girlfriend feverishly try to revive the lifeless Nikki. Slash stumbles into the room shattering the glass shower door. Adler's girlfriend calls 911 and when the paramedics arrive they jam a needle filled with adrenaline into Nikki's heart and rush load him into an ambulance, where Nikki has an out of body experience, hovering above his lifeless body and hearing the paramedics pronounce him dead. This results in the 1989 hit "Kickstart My Heart."