My Predictions for the R+R Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony

Tonight, KISS, Nirvana, Peter Gabriel and a host of others will take their rightful place in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  Here's a few predictions for the induction ceremony.

1.  Gene Simmons will sell his Hall of Fame statue to a fan for $5,000.  Eric Singer and Peter Criss will wear matching outfits.  Nobody will understand a single word Ace Frehley says.

2. Courtney Love will show up drunk, coked up and high on a variety of prescription drugs.  She will create a scene reminiscent of her public meltdown at Pamela Anderson's Roast and then attempt to start a fight with Joan Jett.

3.  John Cusack will join Peter Gabriel on stage, wearing a trench coach and hoisting a boom box.

4.  A confused fan will accidentally ask Linda Ronstadt to autograph their Heart album.  After Linda obliges, the fan will respond by saying, "Thanks, Ann".

5.  Hall won't mention Oates by name.  Oates will finally snap and embark on a psychotic shooting spree that tragically claims the lives of Jackson Browne, James Taylor and Carole King.  His rampage will finally be subdued by a viscous left hook from a fearless and heroic Cat Stevens.