I don't care what anyone says, chicks don't want to hear their phone ding and then see your dong. Brett Favre found out the hard way (insert "hard" joke here.(insert "insert" joke here.)) that not even a star quarterback's helmeted warrior is a welcome addition to a woman's photo album.

Well good news for those of you who can't resist a twig & berries tweet! There's an app where you can anonymously send photos of your junk to a doctor.

The app is called First Derm and you can transmit those schlong shots to a dermatologist so they can diagnose whether or not you've got an STD.  You do it anonymously, and it costs $40.

You submit two photos, a close-up and a wide shot, and a dermatologist will write back within 24 hours with a diagnosis, and let you know if there are any over-the-counter medicines you should use.

You can send photos of other body parts to First Derm for a diagnosis too, but they say about 70% of the submissions are junk pics.

First Derm is available for iTunes and free to download.  But you pay $40 to actually get a diagnosis.