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The 5 Worst Pickup Lines – Guaranteed to Offend!

Epic Fail

Needless to say, if any man or woman tries any of these awful lines on you, just walk the hell away.  Imagine a huge “Warning” sign going off inside your head telling you, “Run Forrest, just run away,” from the complete loser that used it.   Of course they could be people that just happen to read my blog and actually have a great sense of humor.  Good luck trying to figure out which one it is!! 😉

Hey baby, wanna go halves on a bastard?

Proper Response:



Sick sense of humor, check. Funny, check. But will he buy you a drink if you laugh??? Hmmmm…


So, you’re a girl huh?

Proper Response:



Punch him right in the face….twice. Once for you and once for your friend, because you KNOW he wasn’t talking about you.


I just sh*t in my pants. Can I get into yours?

Proper Response:



Hold your breath until you can determine if he’s kidding or not. When it’s safe, breathe in just enough for testing purposes. Then laugh and get him to buy you a drink. Leave right after he hands it to you.


Hey babe, wanna make an easy fifty bucks?

Proper Response:



Scream and slap the A**hole. He’s probably a cop and you don’t need to get in trouble…again!


I bet you could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch.

Proper Response:



Tell him for a free drink you’ll give a demonstration, take the drink then leave. I mean, come on, where are you going to find a trailer hitch at 1 am anyways?


BONUS: Hey, do you like dancing? Good, go over there and dance so I can talk to your friend.



I just had to add a 6th because it's just too damn funny. I think in some way or another we’ve all wanted to say this! 😉


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