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The Most Statistically Improbable Event in Human History — Keith Richards Turns 70

Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images

In what can only be categorized as a modern medical miracle that defies scientific explanation, legendary Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards celebrates his 70th birthday today.   In honor of this exceptionally unlikely occurrence, here are some of the most statistically improbable events in the history of mankind.

5.  Neil Armstrong walks on the Moon.  Scientists estimate that the first homo sapiens to inhabit the earth evolved approximately 250,000 years ago.  When you consider that the first automobile wasn’t invented until 1886, the chances that technology would be able to successfully send a man to the moon just over 80 years later are extremely implausible.

4.  Roy Sullivan is struck by lightning seven times…and survives.  Sullivan was a US Park Ranger who, while working in Virginia’s Shenandoah National Park, survived seven lighting strikes over the course of his 35 year career.  Sadly, the man referred to as the “human lighting conductor” could not survive a gunshot wound and took his own life in 1983.

3.  Ann Hodges is hit by a meteorite.  In November of 1954, Hodges was taking a nap on the couch in her Alabama home when a large chunk of black rock fell from the sky, into her living room and struck her on the hip.  To this date, she is the only known person to ever have been hit by a meteorite.  Some astronomers have calculated that one human being in the United States will be struck by falling meteorite debris every 9,000 years.

2.  A California couple hits the Lottery twice in the same day.  While it is highly unlikely, several people have won Lottery jackpots on multiple occasions.  But what are the chances of a couple winning the  lottery on the same day?  According to a mathematician at Stanford University, the odds are roughly 1 in 24 trillion.  Yet somehow, a  husband and wife from Belmont, California, beat those odds in 2002 when they won $126,000 in “Fantasy Five” and $17 million in Super Lotto plus.

1.  Keith Richards turns 70.  As improbable as each of the prior scenarios were, the chances that a man with Keith’s voracious appetite for consumption would make it to 70 are statistically incalculable.

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