My Playground Assembly Nightmare

How was my Memorial Day Weekend, you ask? Just fine. With two days of basically non-stop rain, I spent most of the weekend wandering around the house deciding if I should crack another beer, watch something crappy on TV or take a nap.

I went into the weekend with big plans of assembling the kids' new playhouse that my wife ordered online. The three large, heavy boxes were dropped off by a truck last week. Rain delays meant postponing assembly until the sun finally came out on Monday. Leaving me one day, instead of a whole weekend to put the damn thing together.

The instructions stated an assembly time of 9 hours with two people. They were not joking. With my teenage kid as my helper, we spent a good 7 hours yesterday and only made it to step #100 (out of 153).  Holy crap, there are SO MANY BAGS OF HARDWARE.

One huge plus: the playhouse came with an assembly app. I scoffed when I first saw the writing on the box. "Download the Free Assembly App" it said. Yeah right, I don't need an app! I'm a man! I barely need the instructions! The app actually turned out to be AWESOME and I'm so glad I got it.

After downloading the specific instructions for my model, the app then walks you through each step, slide-by-slide with a short, narrated animation. The really slick feature is that you can zoom, tilt, and rotate each step to view it from all angles in 3D. You can also tap any of the boards or pieces to show the part # or item description. It was honestly a lifesaver.

I wish I could say the same for this other piece I put together last week. This little dome jungle gym thing was a NIGHTMARE. See the connecting piece (below)? I'm no mathematician but I would guess there are approximately 523 possible combinations to connect it. And only one of them is correct.

Unfortunately, the dome jungle gym did NOT come with a handy app. It came with really hard to read, super-confusing directions. TIP: Drinking during this assembly is not recommended.

Check out this magnetic wristband my wife got me as a gift a while back (Valentines Day?). When she gave it to me, I was like, "thanks honey, that's so thoughtful." Not thinking I would ever use a magnetic wristband for anything. Turns out, it's great! Stick a handful of screws on it or use it to hold various bit drivers. Super nerdy. Super handy.

Speaking of apps... do you have the Hawk Mobile app yet? While our app won't help you with playhouse assembly (and ours doesn't rotate in 3D) it IS pretty awesome. Plus, we've got some cool contests coming up that are only available on the Hawk Mobile App. It's free in the App Store or Google Play.