Santa Claus Is a Big Fat Bully!
From the "WOW you're a buzz-kill" file: Long Island University professor Dr. George Giuliani claims in his book "No More Bullies at the North Pole" that the 1964 animated classic "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" is crammed full of negative behavior like an overflowing sack of gifts flung over the back of Jolly Old Saint Nick.
Dr. Giuliani picks apart the childhood favorite with a fine tooth comb, seeking out anything that might make the viewer even the least bit uncomfortable. I'll leave the speculation as to the state of the professor's social life to you, the reader. I'm guessing if you have the time to delve this deeply into a children's cartoon, the news is not going to be good. Oh! There I went and speculated anyway.
This guy is a total loser. OH! Now I can't stop myself!! Sorry. Back to the real victims. People who just want to enjoy the holidays. Recently Dr. Giuliani appeared on Fox and Friends:
"Rudolph is being treated very very badly, and that should never happen," he told host Gretchen Carlson. "Comet is saying to children, don't ever play with this reindeer again. And he tells him to go home and he bullies him and mocks him, and the other kids start mocking him. Can you imagine if your child's teacher said to the class 'Don't ever play with this child again'?"
The "Professor" (I'm putting that in quotes because really, should this guy be responsible for anyone's education?) also claims that the story has other negative messages like Santa stifling Hermey the elf's passion for dentistry, and the use of the word "misfits" an astonishing 27 times in the hour long program! Clearly the time has come for our military to march on the north pole and strafe Santa's work shop with 50 caliber rounds and hellfire missiles until this evil has been put down in a heap of scorched reindeer flesh draped atop a mixture of splintered tinker toys and half melted Lego blocks.
What do you think? Should the good Dr. get coal in his stocking? Or do you agree that a mistreated, make-believe reindeer can only lead to a childhood filled with misery?