Five Football Fans You Will Meet at Tiny’s Tavern in Billings
As a Broncos fan, Tiny’s Tavern is my favorite place to watch football games here in Billings. Not only is the place decked out with awesome Broncos memorabilia, and each bar stool is named after a Bronco legend, and the crowd chants “Hell Yeah” when the Broncos score, but the bar buys everyone a free round after every victory.
Of course, there are other reasons I dig watching games at Tiny’s. Beer just tastes better out of a schooner. I don’t know why, but it does. Ultimately though, the real reason why I love watching football at Tiny’s is the crazy cast of characters at the bar. With that in mind, here are the 5 types of people you will see at Tiny’s during a Broncos game.
1. The Old Timers – These are the guys rockin’ Karl Mecklenburg and Randy Gradishar throwback jerseys and, if you ask, they will tell you everything you ever wanted to know about the 1977 Orange Crush Defense. Even though they root for this year’s team, they’re still convinced that John Elway was a better QB than Peyton Manning. They show up for every game, but they spend more time sharing stories about the good old days than actually watching the action.
2. The Super Fans – These guys aren’t from Denver, but they go there every year just to see the Broncos play in person. They wear their ticket stubs around their necks and will happily take out a second mortgage on their house to buy Super Bowl tickets if the Broncos make it. They share the same table with their fellow super fans and will treat every play like it’s the last play of the game. If the Broncos are winning 31-0 and the other team misses a field goal, they will cheer just as loudly as they would for a 4th quarter game winning drive.
3. The Dude With the Really High Pitched Voice Who’s Convinced the Referees Have a Conspiracy Against the Team – This guy is a normal person, until the game comes on. Then he transforms into the Incredible Hulk. He will yell at the television every time a first down run nets less than 8 yards. He is sure that every call against the Broncos is ridiculous and he also believes that Denver Wide Receivers are interfered with on every single pass. The shrill sound of his voice will echo throughout the bar as he yells “Come on Ref” after each play.
4. The Haters – Inevitably there will always be fans of other teams. However, the main goal of the haters is to deliberately antagonize the Broncos fans. Usually, the haters will fall into one of three categories: Dallas Cowboys fans, Oakland Raiders fans or guys who don’t care who wins as long as it’s not the Broncos. These guys could freely watch football at another bar that isn’t full of Denver fans, but that would spoil the real fun for them, which is talking smack.
5. The Fat Drunk Dude Who Just Ate a Tiny’s Burger with Fries, a 4 Piece Chicken Dinner and is Taking an Order of Nachos To Go – That guy is me.